BigAssO’s bittersweet symphony

A guy with a haircut reminding that of Mr. Spock from Star Trek asked me if that would be all right if they featured my girlfriend in a new video from Bernstein. Mr. Spock said in the video she would be tied to a wall, being whipped by a guy dressed like a demon.

Holding my girlfriend by a hand he looked like a gay snake whisperer.  He was equally disgusting to those other two guys that were also present in the room. In fact it was not that much of disgust but something rather parodic about them, they reminded me of that “nazi” guys from Big Lebowski.

The worst thing though was that they had my girlfriend and is if  in act of final humiliation against me they were asking what I was thinking about this nonsense.

It was my fault, I should have noticed that something was wrong when several days ago she told me she got an offer from Bernstein. Bernstein was a new fashionable and trendy indie filmmaker popular among those hipster kids who thought they knew all about art just because they were attending art school classes wearing torn trousers bought for a higher price than good Levi’s jeans. I don’t even know why the style was still called indie, as it was almost as much popular as East 17 in early nineties.

Anyway, she said Bernestein wanted her and excited about news she was almost shaking. I prepared her tea and said I would support her till the end.

So here I was in a supporting role standing in front of bunch of snobs seeing my girlfriend all excited about the project which saw her nothing but a sex slave in a totally anti feminist video. The decision was already made as I could figure it out, so the question in my address was nothing but a total formality, nevertheless despite their total indifference I decided to have a little bit fun here.

“And what does that represent, is it any kind of symbol in that video, could you explain me the meaning?” I started.

“Ehmm, you know it is a very good question, but it is not that easy and evident, you see in art you should have this ambiguity which does not directly point you to a problem, but in fact it leaves it upon you to decide…” Mr. Spock said.

“Basically you want to say that the video makes no sense,” I continued rhetorically.

I could see it in a slight blink of his eyes that he was irritated by my remark, but instead of reacting he pretended as if it was absolutely perfect, this was something very characteristic to the people of his circle.

“That was something funny”, he said, “but I am sure that this comment is nothing else than just a good joke from you as I know you really appreciate true art.”

Now he was trying to make a fool of me, making me bow to his remark and retreat, but instead I said, “In fact I have no understanding of art, I simply don’t know anything about it. Well, I know a little bit about guys like BigAssO you know.”

Either pretending not to understand whom I really meant, or really lost, he said, “Who is BigAssO, is he a conceptual artist? I’ve never heard of him.”

These guys were ridiculous, they reminded me of that famous story when Japanese tourists started taking pictures of a radiator in London’s Tate Modern, thinking that it was another exhibit. In fact the radiator was nothing else but a radiator.

These sort of guys would easily mistake a piece of shit to art and vice versa, and the worst thing was that the industry was full of guys like these. The only difference between these guys and the tourists was that the Japanese ones were explained later that it was just a radiator, while nobody took care of these folks.

“Yeah, definitely conceptual artist” I said, “I am surprised you have never heard of him, I thought guys like you should definitely know him.”

“I will look for more on him,” Mr. Spook told me, “Anyway, what do you think? What do you think of the new video?”

Hearing these words I saw my girlfriend with eyes full of expectations and hope, so instead of answering the question I turned to her and asked, “Well, what do you think darling?”

In hurry she started an answer, “…erm… I think… I think it really sounds cool, and I think it would be wrong for me to say no, I think I should give it a try, ermm…”

Hearing this, I gave her a smile, put my jacket on and hurried to leave. “Good luck with that” I said and left with mixed feeling of bittersweet. Bitter, because it took me a long time to come here to this point to understand that I was seeing totally wrong girl for me. And sweet just because now I was free!